
I’ve found adult friendship to be much more complicated than
the friendships of our youth. This book has opened my eyes to the many ways
that my expectations and "wish-dreams" have gotten in the way of
friendships that are right in front of me. Here are a couple of quotes from the
book that really stood out to me:
“We are not guaranteed or entitled to heart friends. They are gifts of grace,
and when we catch glimpses of sisterly love, we must receive it as such with
deep gratitude.”
“… the goal of friendship is to secure ourselves to the sure, steadfast anchor
of Christ and, while holding to that anchor, give and receive the gift of
friendship as we have opportunity. The goal is to enjoy God together with
others and, as we move through life, to sharpen and allow ourselves to be
sharpened by friends. We imitate Jesus with one another, willing to face the
stark realities and consequences of sin, all the while persevering in our
efforts to offer love, grace, forgiveness, reconciliation, comfort, and care to
one another. In doing so, we display to one another and the world how God loves
and, through this, bring him glory. This is our destination, the point on the
map we move toward: bringing God glory.” pg.39
“In our envy of other women and who they are and what they have, we have chosen
not to celebrate them or allow them to get close. In our childishness, we’ve
been inconsiderate in thinking that friendship is for us and about us and
should be what we want. We’ve been inwardly critical, and outwardly too, though
we might not have dared to address the person directly. We’ve been judgmental
and partial and argumentative and a million other things that sting and divide.
These are ashes of our own making.” pg. 59
“We are to observe our friends. What are her gifts? What stories has God
written in her life that could become an impactful ministry to others? What
lies and patterns of behavior are hindering her relationship with God? What
does it seem God is trying to do in her life? As we observe, we use our words
to confirm her gifts, exhort her to ministry, encourage her growth, and excite
her as to what God is doing in her life. Our honey-words have the power to stir
up love and good works in the lives of our friends.” pg. 132
This book has blessed, encouraged and challenged me in the way I think about
friendships. This is such a helpful book and I highly recommend it.